SHALL I PASS AS A POET?

When I was a kiddo, I want to be a poet like William Shakespeare, Edgar Allan Poe, Emily Dickenson and Robert Frost. I would borrow tons (ehem!) of books from our school library just to read their works. However, I never reach a point to write like them. The difference between their works and mine is like heaven and earth -- spanish era translation -- their works are like the maharlika, mine is between sagigilid and timawa. Frustrating! (haha!) It breaks my heart up to now but I've learned my niche in writing. Imagine!! (haha!) I'm no good and not popular like them but I'm the best in my OWN WORLD OF POETRY...YEY! So, here are some of the poems that took me ages to finish..haha!!

This is the latest poem I've written today. In psychiatric nursing, there is a so-called Seasonal Affective Disorder. I guess this poem came about because winter is about to start and my endorphins level are going down.

A DISCONCERTED HEART

The sun silently hides behind the mountain;

Darkness shields the entire place like a theatre curtain;

Cold breeze swiftly passes to give me a sudden shiver;

First drop of snow are falling to mark the start of winter.

The tranquility of the night permits me to hear a cry,

Of a weeping, wounded heart beguile to try,

To open a new door of chance and to watch a flower of love to bloom,

Whilst yearning for lost love to come back and to be home.

Will there be second chances or just a bittersweet goodbye?

Will there be kiss and make-up or just another sigh?

Will there be a future to look forward or just a new beginning?

Will there be hopes to claim or just a painful ending?

But why there is apprehension and doubt if your love is true?

Why my nerves are shaking in fear if it still longs for you?

Why my mind is unceasingly entralled by the thoughts of you?

Should I stop asking questions now and merely start a life with you?

Oh, dear universe connives with me and tell me what should I do?

Should I stop this foolishness or simply start anew?

Let the answer dawn upon me now like a glistening light from above;

Unveil it before my eyes so that I will end these confusing questions on love.

The next poem was written last 14 July 2010. This is a reminder to people who either can't decide or who fears commitment.

JUST CHECKING!!

Hold my hand

Don't ever let it go

Take my heart

Don't break it in two

Walk with me

Don't just leave me behind

Sit beside me

Don't just imagine it on your mind

If you'll say, "I'll take care of you"

Please don't speak of it with uncertainty

If you'll say, "I love you"

Please don't say just today but for eternity.

Now, if you're sure of your feeling, c'mon let's go

But if you're filled with doubts, just off you go

I don't intend you to play a game with me

Just tell me if you're ready to spend your lifetime with me.

RE-POST --- 29 April 2007

"JUST A MOMENT" is the one I wrote in compliance of my REED 20 requirement. Our teacher, Mrs. Tampus, asked us to either write a letter or a poem to someone we personally wants to say "thank you". That's why I've written this poem especially dedicated to my Ate Nina.

JUST A MOMENT

Cloudy days have coated up my life

Now my heart is outrun with hatred; it cuts like knife

While my so-called friend just here to come and go

They're starting to leave me, why is that so?

What lies ahead on these cloudy days?

If what's on my mind is come what may,

Answers are abundant as I began to soar,

Deep into the world that I don't know anymore.

Hey! Why can't I stay in one corner?

To glimpse on my past and re-discover

On how I surmount my difficulties and trials

Before I was captured by this worldly ideals.

I'm rest assured that Someone will take a part,

Who knows the longing and needs of my heart,

But wait, what am I suppose to do,

It's stuck in my tongue, it's hard to let it go.

Until such time, I grew weary on pondering,

Towards the answer that I was yearning,

I gaze up high while my ears were listening,

"JUST A MOMENT OF SILENCE" is what

THE VOICE was whispering.

FREEZING MOMENT is the revised title of THE MOST WONDERFUL DAY. I wrote this poem as a task given by CAT Officer. Obviously, as a COCC applicant, I have to obey the order OR ELSE -- punishment is at stake. The inspiration of this poem was a wedding of a couple I truly admire.

FREEZING MOMENT

It's been so long since I asked you

To marry me in a year or two

I was astonished when you whisper in my ear

That you'll be my bride and there's nothing I should fear.

All the preparations were quite a tedious process,

But you're always on my side as my best therapist,

Your gentle hugs and sweet kisses uplifts my tiresome body

Feels like 7th heaven, every time you take my breath away

Delightful spirit has welcome the most awaited day

Every movement you make is as graceful as a fascinating ballet

I can no longer wait to have a melting glance on you

And eventually say my unwavering vow and my faithful "I DO"

Suddenly, the church doors open as you slowly step out of the car

Mesmerizing shower of sweet-scent petals I can see from afar

My radiant smile and glaring eyes can't get rid off you

For my whole being is undoubtedly entice by your shimmering glow.

At last the moment has come when you walk down the aisle

As your dad send you in the altar, you clasp him with a smile

The symponic voices of angel have vacuumed the surrounding

Now my heart beats like thunder; I can't hardly control its throbbing.

My mind is wondering, my world stops revolving

I'm totally hypnotize by your beauty that's why I'm freezing

My dad pats my shoulder, my mom pinches my side

They're freaking out on how to let my emotion subside

With teary eyes, you, my bride, began to ask

"Babe, I'm wondering what's happening with you?"

I just smiled and softly said, "I'm just so blessed that

God has brought me to you."

RE-POST --- 13 June 2007

As part of our English project (4th year high school), our teacher, Mrs. Tamse, asked us to write an elegy. An elegy is a poem dedicated to someone who died. So I decided to write an elegy to my favorite lola, Lola Liyang.

AN EXEMPLARY GRANDMOTHER

Your death was like the coldness of the winter

Like the precious diamonds that lost its glitter

Sheeps in the pasture were in grief and in pain

When they learned that a dear friend have leave them in vain.

I was aptly astounded when I knew

That you perished just a minute ago

The radiance and the brightness of the night began to gloom

Like the flowers in your garden, it terminated to bloom.

Everyone was touched by the kindness that you showed

Your genuine character will speak of it, I bet you know

You're like a best-selling novel displayed in every bookstore

That everyone wants to keep you with pride and honor.

Thank you for being an exemplary grandmother

You never fail to nurture me with your love and care

Your memories will always be in the depths of my heart

Neither it will fade nor vanish, for you already have a special part.

There are still several poems I've written but it is in my precious notebook back home. By the time I'll visit Philippines, I will post all the other poems. For now, just enjoy this...yikes!!!

~*~manelle~*~

A day with "ME"

A day with "ME" means thinking solely of myself and freeing my mind from everything. I'm just allowing things to happened as it is, no planning, no time frame --- in short, no worries. In a day like this, I usually go to the city --- eating, reading, strolling, shopping (window shopping lang!), and even as simple as observing passers by.

FIRST: GOOFING -- at CHILLIZ... this is a chinese fastfood and you could have a good meal + drinks for $6. This is just to feed my useless parasites in the tummy and to nourish my non-functioning brain cells.

SECOND: LISTENING -- free music in the street mall. There are a lot of entertainers playing music while you enjoy your shopping. Most of the time, I just sat on one of the benches while reading my book and listening to them.



THIRD: OBSERVING -- this is my paparazzi shot of a couple....So sweet!!!

FOURTH: STROLLING -- As I walk along the Murray Street Mall, this car captured my attention. This is a way of promoting GREEN products.



FIFTH: PAINTING -- This is the biggest canvass I've seen in my entire life. This man is painting about Medusa with Sailormen. Around this huge canvass are small pails in which people could drop coins if they want to. Isn't it a smart way of earning money?

~*~manelle~*~

My Theater Experience --- as an audience!

When I was grader, I dreamt of becoming a theater actress. I want to act like those actresses who can manage to deliver an intense line while tears flowing on their cheeks. I want to dance like Sexbomb dancers, aw este, I want to dance without inhibitions like doing full spread of arms, high front kick, a perfect turn up in the air and lands to the ground with a split (ehem!). I want to sing and hit the highest note (take note "HIGHEST NOTE"). I was even willing to give up my 5 points in my total grade in exchange to the theatrical prowess of Lea Salonga and Monique Wilson. However, the so-called "chance, talent and time" were not on my side. They were too aloft that I could hardly see them from a glance. They were nowhere to be found. All I can say was: "GAAAWWWDDD" (with full conviction while closing my eyes and tight hand fist).

From that dream, I started to make a connection with theater by being an audience. The first theatrical play I watched was New Yorker in Tondo. It was held in CAP Building, Cebu City, Philippines. I tremendously enjoyed the experience but making a report out of it -- was a BOOOOOOO!!!

The second play I watched was entitled: Hillsong Christmas Spectacular -- The Shoe Fits In. It was Hillsong musicale version of Cinderella Story.

We had a good time meeting the characters at the foyer.

And just today: 20th of May 2011, I've watched my third theatrical play. I'm still overwhelmed about the Midsummer Night's Dream by Black Swan State Theater Company. There are 3 things that made my experience memorable. First, I just paid half-price for the ticket. Hooray! I have a concession as a student. Second, it was a date with myself and I was sitting in the FRONT ROW. Third, the entire play was incredibly awesome. I wasn't only fascinated by the superb talents but also by the lightings and movements of the characters. I couldn't help but laugh during the acts...uhhhmmm..actually, everybody was really laughing. I would say Luke Hewitt who played Nick Bottom was the most outstanding performer. The humour of this man is --- WOOOOWWW!!

For now, I will enjoy the different plays here in Perth. But I'm looking forward for the grandest experience --- Las Vegas and Broadway.

~*~ manelle ~*~

He Got BIG EyEs!

While doing the rounds before finishing my shift, I accidentally show this cute little thing on top of a cupboard beside a jigzaw puzzle.

My spontaneous reaction --- "CHUCKLED!" This is a bit of reunion I should say.

This is not a creature with a "FuR" that goes low low low low low #aycorny!

This is a creature with black and white circling feathers, wide wings to fly, a hawk-like beak, a flat face and the most prominent feature is the large forward facing eyes and ears. Behold, it is not a plane, it's a bird, it's really a bird --- it's AN OWL.

I will neither talk in depth about its' physical features nor its' way of adaptation to the environment. I will tell you about someone who had been a part of my life. It's more than 2 years since I sat down and thought about him. Lemme recall the beautiful and lovable things about this person.

Like an owl, he got BIG EYES. Those eyes looks good on him. He stand 5'7 1/2" with broad shoulders, soft-mattress-like arms and flubby tummy which make him a huggable homo sapiens from kingdom, Mammalia. Ever since a kiddo, we teased him "OWL" because of those eyes. He will confidently brag that his eyes might be round and big but they are brown and "attractive". Good Lord!!

Like an owl, he is NOCTURNAL. He stays late at night, burning the midnight candle. As a law student, he devotes his time studying those 100-200 pages cases, digesting it and making notes. Obviously, I don't have patience sitting til' the wee hours of the night plainly reading. Shoot me! Now, I also remembered the reason he stays late at night. There was a time that he fears sleeping because he might have seizure and nobody might be awake to help him. I felt bad knowing this because he needed to be wide awake til 4am -5am to make sure that someone can watch over him while he is sleeping. Another incident I want to share was when his mother was sick. I told him to accompany his mother in going to the toilet and to watch over her in the night. The following day, I checked on him and he said, "Giduka pa ko pero gisugo ko." (I'm still sleepy but I need to do some errands.) So I asked him what time he slept because it was already lunch time but he was still sleepy. He replied, "Mga 5am na man guro to. Gaduwa ko computer" (Around 5am I guess playing computer games.) Unreluctantly, I called him insane to be awke til the morning. He said, "Ingon baya ka na bantayan nako si mama. Mao la ko natulog." (Remember you told me to watch over mom that's why I didn't sleep.) Then I replied, "hehehehe. Ok have your lunch and take time to rest". (Bad me!!)

Like an owl, he is CARNIVOROUS. Give him pork or chicken bbq with sweet-chili sauce, BOOM!, his plate will be like brand new (without the thought of a cat licking it). Oops, don't forget to give him a chilly 1 liter of Coca-cola to push down those unchewed meat. I can't bear looking at him happily cutting bits to bits the thick, greasy part of the meat. Then because he knew I feel like throwing up watching him, he will gladly give his biggest smile to hide those big brown eyes.

Like an owl, he is a ATTRACTIVE. This is the adjective that will surely boost his morale..haha! Definitely and undoubtedly, he is a campus crush in our school. Girls and girlie-like get hook with him. He doesn't have only a good-looking face but he is athletic and a Cdt. Major in our Citizen Army Training. (that's like an LBC Package in one!) Moreover, he got a heart that is compassionate and kind. He never fails to provide assistance to those in need. And this is what make him more appealing to people.

So that ends, my lil lil stowee about "the owl" I used to know. His story is always worth to write. He will always be a piece of memory that I will share with enthusiasm to my grandchildren. I know some time in the future, I will see those glaring eyes again and I'll make sure I've got my sunnies on to forget how enticing those eyes are.

~*~manelle~*~

HYUNDAI HOPMAN CUP 2011

It has always been my dream to watch a LIVE tennis match. Last 03 January 2011, I was fortunate to have a day off from my stressful job...I headed to Burswood Dome to witness the game between Italy VS Great Britain at 0930 A.M.

The players for Italy were Francesca Schiavone and Potito Starace while for Great Britain -- Laura Robson and Andy Murray (my crush--yey!!)

I bought my ticket online through Ticketek. Of course, I will never let it pass without taking a souvenir photo of my first LIVE TENNIS MATCH ticket.

The first game was Women's Single. Francesca Schiavone was an awesome player. She can let Laura Robson dive into the floor with her strong right hand smash. Every time she hits the ball, you will hear her saying "uuuHHHHhhh" I don't know if it is something to either annoy or distract the opponent but I find it so disgusting upon hearing that sound..(oops, color green *ting*). Shiavone won the match over the novice Robson.

The second game was Men's Single. It was between Potito Starace VS Andy Murray. As expected, the crowd was cheering for Murray -- including ME. The lean-muscle-gentleman Murray was limping during the game. He looked like a man who had a hip fracture as evidenced by uneven length of lower extremities. It occurred to me that Murray won't be able to finish the match because he looked very sick. However, with grace and luck upon him, he won the match. With all the smiles and repetitive clapping of my hands -- my cheers was all for him. (fan na fan lang ang mode) During the interview, he said that indeed, he is not feeling well because Perth is so hot and he felt like having fever anytime. (oh, how i wish i can wipe your dripping sweat away..yikes!)

I didn't watch the double match already though I was hearing how each team fair during the game. I decided to walk around the Hopman Village. This village had different stalls selling food and souvenirs for the event. But one stall caught my charming eyes (as what my mother described it) , the PHOTO BOOTH. It is a free and you will have a chance to make a choice for the player you want to be in the picture. Without deliberation of my non-functioning sometimes useless neurons -- I chose Andy Murray.

Indeed, my Hyundai Hopman Cup 2011 experience was something memorable. I was able to see the 2011 Australian Open Champion Novak Djokovic while he was practicing in the side court. It was fun cheering with the crowd while taking few breaks with my bottled water.

Next goal ==> Australian Open 2012.

~*~manelle~*~

SWEETEST THING in 2010

After several months of hiatus, I'm finally back to ===> BLOGGING. This is definitely a big congratulations for pushing myself to write something on this blank page. Now, let me start my lil story about my Sweetest Thing in 2010.

Before 2010 ends, I was already pondering how I should write about these 3 cards that I received from "someone". The leftmost card is the first card I received. It was a big surprise for me because that time I was busy packing my things to moved to a new place. After being lambasted by my former landlord, this card made me smile. I never felt so special in my life that someone is saying "sweet thoughts" about me. *coughing* As a certified late bloomer who spent into wishful thinking during graders and high school years, this made me giddy -- giddier -- giddiest...LOL

My favorite line goes like this: Let God draw the blueprints of our love story, whether we're distant away. I'm hoping for that day when our lines be perpendicular and feel the trajectory impulse of my heart so you'll feel the solid geometry of the many hypothesis of my heart shouting. (just strangle me for posting this..^__^)

The rightmost card is the second card I received. It was another HUWAAAWW for me. This is the funniest line I've read that made me roll over my bed because I couldn't stop from laughing. Tears flowed on my cheeks but it was brought about with pure joy.

My favorite line goes: Ikaw ang bugtong itik na nagkapa-kapa sa akong malapukong kasing-kasing. Akung birahun ang bulan sa kalangitan ug i-dribol sa imong atubangan....hehehe

The middle card is the last one I would "probably" recieved. It was not something I expected after couple of months of no communication. Compared to the two previous cards, this third card expressed the humblest apology and saddest goodbye. I do admire this person who admitted his faults and managed to say sorry to me. I know it was something humiliating on his part but he didn't bother at all if I will judge him. (I know he knew I won't to that to him) Honestly, I don't expect people to say an apology to me because only a few could do that and even if the person won't say it, I will readily give my forgivenss. It has been my way of life, to remove baggages in my heart before I'll sleep because I don't want to wake up with a heavy heart.

My favorite line goes: "I'm here for you." (This line is something special to me because in the movie "Passion of Christ"; when Jesus stumbled while carrying the cross, Mary said to him "I'm here for you.")

To the one who sent me these cards, I thank you for the wonderful words you've said and for letting me feel like a princess for a short while. I will forever keep this as a beautiful memory worth of every smile.

I will always love LOVE.

~*~manelle~*~

2010: Year-End Blog

Time checked 12:00AM ... it's officially 2011 already. I could hear the fireworks from my room, imagining as it beautifully paints the dark skies. I'm pretty sure the fireworks display is like a festive celebration in which people are applauding with wide-mouth saying "WOW".

Diverting to the main purpose of this post, instead of giving a summary of the whole events in 2010, I would like to share my learning and realization throughout the year.


1. Don't make rush decisions.

I was a bit anxious and stubborn in making things to happen quickly without proper planning. I was treating life like one snap of a finger then everything will happened according how i will it. But, NO! That is not how life works. Life is filled with enigmatic events. Everything is uncertain. The only certain thing is that you have to make decisions and take the consequences of it. Rushing is only applicable to childish, irrelevant and unimportant things but not to major issues/problems. A good decision is deliberated, weighed and most especially it is prayed sincerely.

2. No regrets only lesson learned.

In all the decisions I made in 2010, I want to simply accept it. If I made mistakes, I should have learned from it. I would say, I have truly learned from it. If I made a good decision, I want to congratulate myself for mobilizing my neurons to work. LIFE, WORK and LOVE are the major categories in making decision.

If I will check how I fair in these 3 areas:

LIFE -- Excellent. I have learned to be more focus, kind, patient and persevering.

WORK -- Excellent. I'm like a carabao who can work for long periods disregarding the idea of exhaustion.

LOVE -- NC (Not Competent). This is the area that needs a lot of hard work. I don't want to look back the past and blame others for causing trauma on me. I still trust someone so swiftly. I trust their words -- I choose to believe without doubts. Then I fall in love so deeply -- then they just break my heart.

3. Show appreciation to all the people who showed kindness to you.

Ever since I was a child, my parents have taught me to say thank you for every good deed someone has done to me. Living in Melbourne for 8 months was like living in a remote place of Africa in which you are starving to death. I was unemployed. No work. Plainly studying. Everyday, it feels like breaking my head to budget my money and think on what to do so that I will survive in the coming days. In this time, I realized to value everything in my life. Small or big things should be dealt with enthusiasm because you don't know when it is taken away from you. As they say, you will only appreciate the things you have right now, if you experience it to be gone from you. I would say, simple acts of kindness is highly appreciated. Everytime someone will give me food, it feels like heaven already. I am always glad if someone will invite me to a party because I can have free food and i'm confident they will ask me to bring some food home. Another experience was someone gave me 3 sausages and I made sure it last for 3 days to save money. And to drink milk for 3 days because you have nothing to eat is like walking in the desert under the scorching heat of the sun with your jar of water.

To all the people who helped me throughout the year: Bandalan Family, Casil Family, Ate Lonie, Paowee, Kuya Ron, Yeli, and May..My heartfelt thanks to you.

4. Pray harder and Trust God.

In everything I do or say -- I will never forget to bring back the glory to God. God is my fortress and my strength. His unconditional love and mercy has sustained my poor spirit and uplift my dying hope. God enables me to reach for my dreams and He bring forth people who are willing to share their blessing to me. As always I will say: God is good, all the time.


Indeed, 2010 is rough to me but it makes me better and stronger. I do hope and pray that 2011 is a far better year. A year that will not only bless me but will also strengthens the best attributes that I have.


Time checked 1:09AM ( 01 Jan 2011) ... my bed is calling me already. Happy New Year!

~*~manelle~*~